There is No Good and Bad…


There is No Good and Bad…

Every experience, no matter how bad it seems, holds within it a blessing of some kind.

The goal is to find it.’

I saw the above quote on Instagram last week and it reminded me of a weekend I had just before Christmas.

A nightmare weekend…

In the week leading up to this weekend I’d been self-sabotaging, i.e. doing all the things I know will make me feel crap and not doing the things on my ‘go to’ list. But I didn’t know why, so I was already feeling pretty frustrated and cranky!

On the Saturday, this entire blog went down and I literally spent the whole day trying to speak with someone in America via a ticketing system and live chat, when all I wanted to do was get hold of a real person! I felt so frustrated and like no one was helping me.

In addition, I spoke with a friend who told me they’d been through a pretty tough time recently and I was also aware that I’d not been spending enough quality time with my husband.

All in all, it was a pretty emotional day. I felt like I’d let my friend down by not being there for them and that I wasn’t being a particularly good wife. I felt all the hard work I’d put in to this blog had now been lost and to top it off, I’d not even thought about Christmas shopping!

What did I do?

I cried – a lot! I knew that somewhere there was a positive lesson to learn from all of this but in all honesty, at half past midnight when I was crying and swearing it was difficult to see!

Now I’m a big believer in crying! Some see it as weakness, but I find it’s a necessity in order to move on. By crying I accept the emotion that I’m feeling which enables that part of my brain to rest and let the rational part take over so that I can problem solve.

So what was the lesson?

Simple – the lesson was gratitude.

Sometimes when we’re working to achieve our dreams we’re ‘flying high’ with focus and excitement, we don’t take time to appreciate where we are right now. So life brings us back down to earth with a bump and I quite clearly needed it!

When my website went down, the first person I wanted to be with was my husband and it reminded me that he is what I am most grateful for.

I was also reminded that my friends and family are a priority but that I need to look after myself first, as I can’t help anyone else unless I’m healthy both mentally and physically. Even when we’re feeling awesome, we need to keep doing the basics or else, funnily enough, we start to feel like shit again!

I also realised how important this blog is to me because it enables me to reach out and help other people as well as express my creativity.

What happened next?

Guess what? When I reconnected with gratitude and accepted where I was at that moment, everything else started to fit in to place.

  • The backup for my website was found and restored in full.
  • I spent the whole of Sunday with my husband and he helped me pick Christmas presents so all the shopping was done in no time at all.
  • I spoke with my friend and explained I had had some stuff of my own to deal with and they were perfectly fine about it.
  • My husband’s work schedule shifted so I had the opportunity to have lie ins over the next few days and catch up on some much needed sleep.
  • I figured out why I’d been self-sabotaging and was able to do something about it.

What should you take away from this?

Notice how I never said that I’d had a ‘bad’ weekend?! There are no good or bad situations, just how we interpret them. The ‘bad’ situations happen because there is a lesson which we need to take from them.

Be grateful for what you have right now whilst working for what you want. I promise there will be many things to be grateful for, even if it’s simple things like a warm bed and a good night’s sleep! Start a gratitude diary by simply writing down three things you’re grateful for every morning and I’m sure you’ll be pleasantly surprised.

And remember – life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it so next time you’re faced with a ‘bad’ situation, ask yourself, what’s the lesson I need to learn from this?

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