What’s Your Story?
What’s your story?
We each have a story, so what’s yours? There is often confusion between who we tell ourselves we are and who we want to be. Until these are in line, we will never achieve our goals because it impacts our beliefs.
One of my favourite quotes
I would like to share one of my favourite quotes;
‘You are not what happened to you, but who you want to become’
We often spend so much time focusing on what has happened to us that we forget who we want to become. Our story is often made up of key events which have happened to us in our life and whilst some of them are positive, our natural tendency to lean towards the negative means we let the negative events dominate our story.
We use this story to give us an excuse and let ourselves off for behaving in ways we don’t really like because a certain event happened to us. But if we do this, we will stay trapped in the past and never become who we really have the potential to be, our true selves.
Often we don’t realise how much attention we give to the negative, but whilst ever we focus on these parts of our story, we put ourselves in a place of fear which will prevent change. However, change requires us to alter our story and even if this change is for the good and will bring us happiness, there can sometimes be resistance around this.
Why? Because we feel we will lose our identity. Who will we become if we change?
Let me give you an example…
I lost my parents in a car accident when I was 17 and I was devastated. For many years afterwards I let this event become my story. I thought this was who I was now, the girl whose parents died in a car accident.
I thought that this was my story because my world had changed and if this wasn’t my story, then what was? I let it become my identity because I didn’t think I had a choice. But there was also a strange feeling of safety in it because whilst ever this was my story I knew who I was.
But what I didn’t realise until later was that this story held me back, it kept me in a place of fear and it made me feel like a victim.
The reason I love the quote above is because the first time I read it, was the first time I realised I did in fact have a choice. My story is exactly that my story so I get to write it and that scared 17-year-old was not who I wanted to be anymore.
What should you take away from this?
I want you to think about you story – what is it and how does it present itself in your everyday life? How do you ‘confirm’ it to be so? Is that story the one you want it to be? If so, that’s awesome! If not, have a think about what you want your story to be.
But most importantly I want you to take away that you have a choice in every decision you make in life, your story can only be written by you so own it and make it a great one!
I’ll shortly be doing a post on goals which will be really helpful if you’re unsure on who you want to become!
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